Sunday, September 2, 2007

Life is Precious...

Warning: This post may be a bit in depth and emotional...

What a day. I don't know how to explain it, other than horrible and awakening at the same time. It started off bad...everyone in my house woke up in a bad mood (no idea why, just one of those days). Daniel and I were at eachother, Cooper & Georgia were cranky (kids aren't stupid, they sense tension). I don't know...Daniel hasn't had enough sleep lately and I guess I ask too much of him sometimes...not going to go into all that, but we weren't on good terms really. We still went walking around the beach as we usually do on a Sunday, but it wasn't a happy morning. Daniel went to work, I came home and then went out to Mum & Dads for Fathers Day lunch.

Cut to the chase...Cooper has received tons of new toys this week, having his birthday on Wednesday and his party yesterday...we took one of his new games out to mums so we could all play together. Me, my niece and nephew, and Cooper opened up his game, set it all up and had a play. We played for awhile, then had something to eat, then played again...basically we were in and out from the loungeroom to the outside area. Cooper was inside for a little while after lunch, watching Blinky Bill as far as I knew. I organised cake for dessert (we had tons leftover from his party) and cut it up, then called out to Cooper to come and have some cake. Mum went in to get him, and he came walking out of the loungeroom with a plastic bag (from his new game) over his head. It was tight, must've been a squeeze to get on and even harder to get off. Mum & I ran to him and Mum pulled it off his head, I grabbed him straight away and he was just staring at me. I stood him up and was asking him if he was okay, he was looking at me but wouldn't say anything. He was dizzy. I just picked him up and kept asking him if he was okay, he finally said he was okay and I just squeezed him so little boy is as fragile as anyone else. You think that things like this can never happen to you, you're so careful, you are responsible...but my god, it happened so quick. Its my fault. I left the bags on the table, not even giving them a second thought. I can't believe I did that, how stupid. Thank god my baby is alright, I can't even bear to think about what MIGHT have happened. A few minutes later I just burst into tears and couldn't stop beautiful sister was there to comfort me, and we just couldn't stop saying how quick shit happens, no warning, nothing. I have felt sick all day, I rang my hubby tonight at work and cried on the phone to him, he was really upset but not cranky at me, thank goodness. He talked to Cooper for ages on the phone, those two are the best of friends. I don't know how to feel about it...

Anyway, I think this may have been a warning to me. I have been stressed and cranky and over-emotional lately, well for a while now...always worrying about work, or the house, or being too fat, or something else that I create. I am constantly yelling at Daniel, and the kids, for no reason other than me being unreasonable. I think I have learnt that you need to cherish every single day, hour, minute that you have with your family as it can be taken away from you at any given moment. Life is precious, and short...

On a lighter note, Cooper had a lovely birthday party yesterday with all of his little friends. I'll put some photos up of his day as my Mum checked this morning for photos, so here they are...

This is Cooper and his friend Jonty, they go to preschool together on a Thursday and are the best of friends. This is the first time we have seen Jonty outside of school, so they were both very excited.

Coop dancing with all the girls.....sooooo cute!!!!!!!

All of us after cutting the cake (his third cake this week!).

My exhausted boy after three hours of playing & partying.

My apologies for this lengthy post, but I had to get this off my chest. Tomorrow WILL be a better day.



  1. BLOODY HELL SAR!!!!!!! My heart was in my mouth when I read that! But you aren't alone, many of us have had experiences where our child is in immediate danger! I have and it's f****ing scary! I'm feeling for you! When Mia was 16 months old we were at my sis-in-laws place and they have a balcony, well everyone had always commented on how there was too much room between the rungs as a child could probably slip through. And guess whose child got through the rungs and was on the other side of the balcony, she didn't fall but could have and it was 3 metres or so to the ground, AND (this is the worst bit, I was right next to her and it happened! I just leant over and grabbed her so fast.. I was a bit tipsy but have never sobered up so fast in my whole life! The thing that really shitted me off was that they didn't do anything about it for ages until THIER next child was of crawling age.... ROAR!!!
    And do you know what, we all have our moments as wives and mothers, I know I am just like you at times, geting pooey at the hubby and Mia, you are totally normal! If you ever need to get things out, let me know, most Mum's are the same and we all have our meltdowns here and there! BIG HUGS for you! xxx

  2. Man, sometimes we are just so lucky. Sometimes I get distracted too and don't have my eye on the ball. I'm glad your little boy is okay! Life is just too precious. When Seth was 6 weeks old I accidently chopped the top off his thumb with the nail clippers - I couldn't function for the rest of the day and Andrew had to come home from work! I haven't cut my kids nails since...I don't trust myself. I guess what I'm saying is that we all second guess our abilities as parents and you shouldn't be too hard on yourself. Your kids love you! As for feeling bummed and cranky and stressed, perhaps you should talk to someone about it - sometimes there more to it than just being busy. Hey, I'm all for getting some help - I had postnatal depression with both my kids and it really helped to talk to someone (I'm not assuming this is your case at all - it just doesn't hurt to look a little deeper). Take care Sar, and remember there are people just like you out there.