This is how I'm feeling right now.
I feel like my world is spinning around and around and around and I'm JUST managing to hold on for the ride. Everywhere I turn there is something else I 'should' be doing, somewhere else I 'have' to be, someone else I 'must' please. Somewhere in all this, I get lost. I lose myself and feel like I'm spiralling...and then something clicks and I start climbing the rope again, pulling myself out of the hole that I feel like is my life at times!
I guess this is part of the whole depression thing that has been a part of my world since having PND with my last baby. I am so proud that I am in control of this and got myself off my meds earlier this year, but put this down to totally being diet & exercise based...feeling it in my mood when these factors are out of whack and pulling myself back into line when I need it. Only I can pick myself up, brush myself off and get myself back to where I need to be for myself and my family.
Sometimes I feel like people don't understand just how busy I am...not that they have to but its something I think about. I don't REALLY care about what anyone else thinks...but I just need to get this down on paper (or blog screen, whatever!) so I have a bit of a handle on just how much myself and my family are doing right now, and also to look back in years to come and remember just WHY I felt like my life was manic!
Me, Sar, aka Mum -
~ work 3 days per week (full days)
~ run my online scrapbooking business (involving stock, orders, kits each month, forum, gallery, facebook posts, newsletters, let alone the paperwork which is so totally and disgustingly behind right now)
~ exercise most days (usually 4-5 gym sessions on a good week & walking/running 3-4 days)
~ dancing mum (take girls to studio two days a week, practice 2-3 dances with them each day, eisteddfods some weekends)
~ playgroup with my girls every Monday morning
Dan, my hubby, aka Dad -
~ works nightshift four days a week
~ involved in mines rescue (lots of training, comps, time at the station, time away)
~ studying for his Undermanagers (time for this is lacking right now)
~ school pickup every single day of the week after only 6hrs sleep per day (god love him)
~ footy/oztag two days per week (coaches Cooper's team)
~ takes Georgia to dancing one day per week (while I'm at work)
Cooper, my boy, 7yo -
~ five days at school
~ two afternoons at oztag/footy
~ cricket on Saturday mornings
~ Nippers on Sunday mornings
~ usual homework, news, reading etc that comes with being in 1st class
Georgia, my eldest daughter, 4yo -
~ 6 dance classes per week (including private for ballet & jazz solos)
~ preschool two days per week
Bronte, my baby girl, 3yo -
~ 2 dance classes per week (including private for jazz solo)
~ preschool two days per week
And this is before my Georgia starts school next year and things get even more hectic with double the home readers, homework etc coming home.
Somedays I wonder how I do it...and this list only really shows the things I HAVE TO DO - let alone the other factors of my life including scrapbooking (what is that again, when did I last scrap?!), socialising with friends (which is of major importance to me), watching True Blood with my hubby (yep, addicted!!), facebook (lol!). There is no downtime in my life really, no rest, no relaxation...who has time for that??
I guess what I want to know is this....is EVERYONE this busy? Does everyone have commitments every single day of the week and wonder just when things are going to slow down? I feel like my life is passing me by at a rate of knots...and there is not a thing I can do about it!
Your thoughts? Would love to hear from you!
